Last year was the first raya I celebrated as a wife.
This year is the first raya I am celebrating as a mom-to-be.
Next year insyaAllah I will be celebrating raya as a mom.
The past 29 years? When I have always been celebrating as a daughter. Lain sangat semuanya.
When I was young, Raya to me was all about new baju kurung (I always had at least 4-5 pasang each raya, tailor-made), new baju casual (always Guess or Esprit), new baju tido (sepanjang malam ada kat kampung mesti pakai new pyjama), new undies (always start pakai new undies first day raya, perasaan dia...sangat best, hahah) wearing jewelleries (every raya eve, mama will pakaikan rantai, gelang kaki and gelangan tangan to be worn sepanjang raya), collecting duit raya (always been getting almost a thousand every year).
As I grew older, slowly, semua jadi berkurangan. Baju kurung maximum tempah 3 pasang je. Baju casual only a piece or two beli dekat Pakson sale. Baju tido baru sepasang je beli kaftan dari Kelantan. New undies pulak beli dekat Scarlet Jusco yang jual 5 pieces for RM10. Kadang-kadang mama terlupa keluarkan jewelleries from the safe, so, pakai je rantai mama yg ada yg besar gedabak, panjang giler. Duit raya.. hardly reach RM400 a year.
Bila dah start kerja, slowly, semua semakin berkurangan. Baju kurung masih 3 pasang tapi some tempah, some beli ready-made je. Baju casual, baju tido, seluar dalam semua beli kat FOS. Jewelleries, takde pakai yang baru...pakai apa yang memang tengah pakai hari-hari. Duit raya, I give out RM1,000, dapat blk dalam RM300.
Bila dah kawin, semua dah takde. Baju raya cari kaftan yang dah siap je jual kat ruang legar shopping mall. Baju tido, seluar dalam, baju casual dah tak beli dah for raya, pakai apa yang ada. Jewelleries pakai barang hantaran dari suami, my barang kemas yang simpan dalam safe dah tak pernah kelar-keluar dah. Duit raya keluar double than usual, tapi tak dapat balik dah, because my dad stop giving me duit raya sejak kawin.
Yes, everything fades away as you grow older and older, you get less and spend more, you buy less things for yourself because there are other important things to spend on.
Tapi semua tu material je. Each phase of my life has given me different meaning of raya. More meaning of course. We appreciate raya better each year. Dengan penuh rasa kesyukuran, rasa rendah diri meminta maaf dan ampun, saling menziarahi all our family members. And alhamdulillah, I could not ask for a better raya, now that I am a wife and carrying a child in my womb, semua ni memberi erti yang sangat bermakna. Takde baju tido and undies baru pon takpe.. haha my raya will still be complete.
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri kepada semua. Maaf Zahir dan Batin.
2 comments:
selamat hari raya izrin and ali :)
eh..FOS quite expensive apa..tak la kata murah sgt kan..hehe
nnt dah ada anak, shopping is always for them. you wont feel sad, but happy...my husband had to stop me sbb bila masuk kedai je ill go like "eh..qays tak de ni lagi', "eh..qays need this la..", "eh..tak cukup la"..bla..bla..bla..doesnt goes for baju je, even botol susu. lol
Selamat hari raya to u too... :)
omg, i pon tak sabar dah ada anak nanti..esp if its a girl kan, lagi la byk benda terasa nak beli for her. hehe.. i can imagine how u feel ;)
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