Sunday, January 20, 2013

Review 2012

Last year I didn't bother to review what I have achieved and what I have not achieved. Sebab tu banyak tak ter-achieve. So let's do it again. Yang achieve, syukur alhamdulillah..yang tidak tu..cuba lagi tahun 2013 (berapa banyak tahun dah carried forward niiii)

What I have achieved :)

1. First baby.
Alhamdulillah...paling bersyukur. After 8 months of marriage, Tuhan makbulkan. Syukur..thank you for choosing my womb, Imaan Iris..

2. Babymoon.
First year anniversary with hubby, I was already 2 months pregnant. So that was my babymoon, at Cherating.

3. Langkawi
I cannot even remember the last time I went to Langkawi, maybe I was 12 at that time. So 2012, brought me to Langkawi with hubby and my parents.

4. Start 10% salary in ASB
Alhamdulillah, tiap bulan tutup mata je, seolah-olah I never get that amount of money.. then kita akan redha dengan pemergian duit itu dari bank simpanan. It's for the future.

5. Korea
Went to Korea with hubby and MIL. Activity kali ni hanya pergi visiting hubby's relatives in Korea. It was really nice, cuma weather je tak best, was supposed to be autumn, but when we went there, it was still summer.

6. Involve in charity work
Kemas my wardrobe to give some space to my new baby girl. So most of my baju, we collected and donated to some kampung that my father and his friends have adopted and pledged to help every year.

7. Buy a house
Alhamdulillah, another big thing happened in my life. Hubby bought a house at Denai Alam, a super-linked house. That is our first new home that will be completed in 2014. Rezeki baby :)

Semoga 2013 dapat achieve yang lebih banyak tahun 2012. Ameen.

Check out my To-do list for 2013. Hope it's not too late to wish everyone HAPPY NEW 2013!!!

Monday, January 14, 2013

The birth of my first child

A quick summary of the whole labour thingy.

4 Dec 2012, I went to see Dr Siti, she did the vaginal examination and told me that I was already 3cm dilating. But I was then at my 36 weeks plus, which was at the borderline of being a term baby. She advised me to rest at home and continue with my weekly checkup, but straight away come to the labour room if I am feeling the contraction or if there is any blood show or if the waterbag burst. Read the story here.

12 Dec 2012, I went to see Dr Delaila, because Dr Siti was on vacation for 2 weeks plus. My baby was still not engaged then. I was still only 3 cm dilated. Read the story here.

20 Dec 2012, my 39th week checkup with Dr Delaila, she then confirmed that my baby has engaged. But still, I feel very normal. No signs of labour at all. Read the story here.

 26 Dec 2012, Dr Siti's back to the clinic, and it was my 40th week checkup appointment. Dr Siti was so surprised to see me still around. She checked I was still 3cm dialted, percaya tak?? It has been 3 weeks of only 3 cm opening? But only this time, I was fully effaced. 3 weeks ago, the dinding was still tebal. So she said since sudah fully effaced and already dilated, and I am already 1 day overdue (already term), she said she wouldn't want to wait long. Takut baby berak dalam perut. So she suggested to induce the baby out.

I was admitted to the labour room straight, that time it was 11am. I was asked if I wanted to eat anything first, I refused because I just had my breakfast at 8am earlier, little did I know that I was not gonna allowed to take any food once I enter the labour room.

Ini adalah labour room di SDMC.

At 12pm we started with CTG scan, dengar baby's heartbeat and monitor the contraction. After about half an hour the midwife came in and told me that the reading doesn't look fantastic. My baby's heartbeat was at sleeping pattern. It could be two things, either she was really sleeping, or it could be some kind of a complication (I really can't remember what was the scenario, I was too panic to focus on what she was saying) that requires me to do a c-sec. Doctor Siti advised me to take a walk for about 45 minutes and re-do the CTG scan, and thank god, the reading was back to normal. Meanwhile...still no contraction.

The midwife gave me ubat untuk berak. Sesuatu cecair yang di pancutkan ke dalam bontot. OK, tak perlu la  nak describe it, tapi effect dia... huh, within 2 minutes. Terasa kosong perut lepas tu. Dr Siti came by and checked my opening. It was already 4cm. Ntah kenapa kali ni, dia seluk terasa amat sakit. She then pecahkan air ketuban. Terasa air yang keluar tu sangat warm. Terasa macam tahan kencing selama seminggu and finally terkencing dalam seluar. Camtu la rasanya. Then, it was time to induce, masuk macam drip air slowly, killing me hour by hour.

Well, memula tu ada rasa contraction tapi tak la sakit sangat, tapi lama-lama...... I think start sakit sangat masa pukul 4pm onwards. Camne rasa sakit contraction? Macam period pain, tapi the intensity is 200 times more than normal period pain, indescribable. And it gets more and more intensed by the hour.

I remembered the midwife gave me a few options on pain management. And if I want to take those, I have to request before the cervix dilated to 6cm. At first, I was contemplating, I know some people who went through labour without taking any pain killer. My sister in law is one of them. So to me, probably the pain is bearable, so I planned to go without anything. TETAPI, at 5cm dilation, memang tak tahan, sakit dia tuhan je tahu. I was lack of oxygen, they had to give me some breathing assistance. My baby's heartbeat was going low and low everytime the contraction comes. Hubby got to remind me to breathe in so that my baby could also breathe. But I was lack of oxygen, I couldnt breathe in, I felt so warm in the labour room, I was sweating, I thought I was gonna die.

Every contraction hubby had to remind me "Breathe in sayang, baby's heartbeat is dropping", and when I hear that, I gathered my strength to breathe, ntah dari mana semangat tu datang, just for my baby. At 5cm dilation, I asked the midwife to cucuk my bontot with Pethidine (which only relief 20% of the pain). Oh, tak rasa macam amik pain killer langsung. Masih sakit kay. Dia cuma bagi khayal and tido jer kot. Tapi bila contraction datang.... huh! Betul-betul rasa macam nyawa kat hujung tanduk, seriously, I am not exaggerating. Rasa nak mati tu bukan sebab sakit contraction tu, by the way, jangan salah sangka, rasa nak mati tu datangnya daripada tak cukup oxygen, bila takleh nak tarik nafas, tu yang rasa nak mati tu.

Berkali-kali jugak la, midwife datang untuk seluk vagina nak tengok berapa cm dah bukak. Lepas 6cm onwards, sakit contraction makin menjadi-jadi. Somewhere along the way, the midwife gave me the laughing gas, I didn't ask for it though. Dia bagi, amik je la. Sedut gas ni memang best. I would say relief jugak la sakit contraction yang semakin teruk tu.

Midwife kept asking me "Ada rasa nak terberak tak? Kalau ada rasa nak terberak panggil ok?" And everytime contraction comes, hubby kept on asking "Ada rasa nak terberak tak?" Sebenarnya memang ada rasa nak terberak dah 2-3 jam yang lalu dah, I dont understand apekah maksud nak terberak tu. So when they kept asking while I was in pain, seriously rasa nak penampar je sapa yang tanya tu.

Finally at 10pm, I heard the midwife said "9.5cm bukak, panggil doctor jap eh.." OMG, it's time! AND, surprisingly at that very moment, hilang terus rasa sakit contraction. Although the contraction reading tu semakin tinggi, tapi memang tak sakit, yang rasa hanya rasa nak terberak! Oh, ini maksudnya nak terberak, macam ada sesuatu nak terkeluar dari bawah ni yang sangat keras.

Dr Siti came in, together with 3 other midwives and my husband, semua suruh I push push push. Everytime ada contraction, I have to teran sekuat hati. To be honest, I wasn't doing very well in the beginning. Each contraction boleh tarik nafas and teran sebanyak 3 long ones. Tapi I could only do two times. Hey, dont blame me. I had lack of oxygen, and my last meal was 14 hours ago. Mana ada tenaga beb! They kept on saying "Teran macam nak berak keras" and hubby said I actually shouted (I dont remember though) "Mana ada berak keras sangat macam niiiiiii!!!!???"

Dr Siti told me that if I don't do it right baby will be suffocated sebab kepala baby asyik keluar bila teran then masuk balik when I inhale, What they want is kepala baby to keluar and tak masuk-masuk dah, so I had to do it fast and take every chance I have on every contraction. Mendengar kan baby akan suffocate, sekali lagi, semangat yang datang ntah dari mana kuat balik. Maka teran la aku like there's no tomorrow. Doctor also performed episiotomy, untuk besarkan lubang nak keluarkan kepala baby, and dia potong tu tak rasa pon, walaupun dengar bunyi gunting tu.

Teran punya teran, tetiba at 10.48pm terasa perut kempis dari selalu and ada rasa sesuatu yang sangat panas placed on my tummy. It was the baby, and she was purple. Ya Allah... did I almost lose her because I had no energy to push her out. Oh God, Alhamdulillah.. dia selamat dikeluarkan jugak. Syukur, ya Allah....

Doctor asked my hubby if he wanted to cut the tali pusat, and he said yes. Dia potong tali pusat tu while she was on me, although I don't remember that scene. Then they took her away untuk cuci segala.

Introducing little Imaan Iris Binti Muhamad Shazali, weighed 3.4kg. Lepas cuci, she was no more purple. She was as white as snow, lips as red as blood, I swear she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life.

Then doctor keluarkan uri pulak dari perut together with apa-apa saja benda yang telah bersarang dalam perut ni selama 9 bulan. I dont know about other people but to me, keluarkan uri ni agak sakit la, sebab doktor tu seluk masuk dalam vagina untuk tarik keluar. After that, doctor jahit potongan tadi. but before that dia inject local anesthetic kat peha, so tak rasa la sakit menjahit tu. Terasa sangat lega lepas tu.

Then they put Iris on my chest tapi she did not latch on straight away. I had the privilege to hold her for a while, before they took her to the nursery to warm her up.

I was changed to a single bedded room at about 1am. That was the longest night in my life.

Syukur...ya Allah. May you be everything that your name spells out. Be faithful and be the iris of my eyes forever...

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