Ijab Qabul review - The Groom is Here

We were busy taking photos in the room, somebody (can't remember who) barged into the room and said "Pengantin laki dah sampai". Tiba-tiba seluruh jantung BLUP macam jatuh ke lantai. And I couldnt remember what happened at that time. The wedding planner reminded us before jangan turun selagi dia tak panggil. So we waited quite awhile up there in the room. I was told not to stand by the window. Tapi all the girls semua tengok tengok from the tingkap and saw the groom. "Ehhhh handsome lah Aliiiii" I heard the girls said. Chewah chewahh

The groom was told not to get out from the car while the rombongan oraganising the hantaran together. Sebab takut hantaran tergolek golek dalam kereta, the kepala and the bottom part of the hantaran were held by different people. So they need to get them organised. Patut la had to wait awhile.

It was raining when I was waiting. But the moment the groom was about to get out from the car, hujan macam reda sikit. (Macam dalam drama haha) Alhamdulillah.

Tengah takut tu, sampai tak boleh nak duduk. Getting ready to go down. Some of my friends were already down at the hall, tak boleh nak naik. Maybe tangga banyak orang. Takut jugak, "what if I slip? what if I tergolek kat tangga? what if I...." There were too many "what ifs" in my mind at that time. So whatever people were talking about, didnt even register in my head. I was smiling, as if I was listening. Truth is... the mind was blocked by what ifs...

Tak ujan pon, saja jer the groom gatal kene berpayung. The whole rombongan disambut dengan bunga rampai by my two lovely aunties, mak ngah and mak chik.

Arranging the hantaran. Kene lah ikut turutan yang mana letak paling depan and yang mana paling belakang. Hantaran semua dipegang oleh para-para lelaki terdiri dari brother, cousins and best friends.

Uishhh..TU DIAAA... berpakaian serba putih, kain adalah from my engagement hantaran. Mula-mula he didnt like it. Sebab dia kata he thinks that kain tu panas. Tapi his tailor cakap, kain tu kain bagus. mahal ok, i dpt free from Jakel. Jakel ketuk me with my kain baju tunang, then when I buat bising, Jakel said I can get one kain baju lelaki of ANY types. I chose the most expensive one. And put it on my engagement dulang. :)

The house is very small so it is very limited. Not everybody could go in. Kene lah bagi space to the groom, nanti panas sgt, sementara gelabah karang, pengsan pulak. The women pulak were directed to the back where the pelamin is.

My spokesman (my uncle) and his spokesman (his uncle), macam berjanji pulak pakai baju kaler sama. Masa ni, PA system tak sampai lagi (my wedding planner forgot about it, and only asked his assistant to look for it about two hours ago).  So sementara tunggu tok kadi sampai, mereka pun mula lah mengotakan janji masing-masing yang telah terikat semasa hari pertunangan..perjanjian 7 dulang to the bride.

Sirih junjung

Mixture of my favourite chocolates

Tissot watch that I had been eyeing

Perfume and lotion set

clutch bag and jeweleries (incomplete sebab takut hilang. will update the full photo)

Al-Quran and kain solat

mas kahwin, duit hantaran and wedding ring (pun tak complete jugak)

Di Selangor, orang kata mas kawin and duit hantaran disatukan. It was very confusing. Because what I learned, mas kawin is meant for the bride to use it if ada any emergencies bila ketiadaan suami, duit hantaran is to be given to the parents of the bride untuk meringankan beban membuat majlis perkahwinan. If you combine the two, it will be haram for the parents to use it for other purpose. However, Selangor has combined them together as one mas kahwin, because the minimum RM300 is too low, it doesn't give any benefits to the bride in the future.

Well I chose to stick to what I learned. My mas kahwin is stick to the minimum of RM300 set by JAIS. Duit hantaran will be given to my parents (or like WAS going to be given). hehe..My parents gave them to me anyway. It doesnt matter, I didn't need to announce it like it would have been if it was set as my mas kawin.

AND we didnt go through the stage where the groom side has to mention each and every item in the dulang. They also did not have to mention the price of any barang berharga like the jewelleries and stuff. I felt it was not necessary. To my surprise I had attended a nikah before that requires the groom to announce the price of each barang berharga. I know it has to be written down somewhere in the marriage registration form. We left it blank, and it was not a problem. You can put it, but I think it is not necessary to announce it. Own choice.

My wedding planner cued for the bride to come down. I was walking very fast I thought I slipped. Argghh it was just in my mind. My dress was super long (Because I didnt get the right pair of shoes with the right height). Patutnya, cari kasut dulu before you go for your fitting. That was my biggest mistake. Ok, one of the biggest la, apart from not able to get myself to be thinner.

I was heading to my pelamin that I oh love so much.

My wedding planner said I was the second to use this set of flowers. Tipu lah tuh. I thought I have seen it some where else. But nevermind. I loved it anyway. And I love the chair. It was unique for me. I thought kerusi tu tak muat for both of us to sit. Because both of our bon-bon bleh tahan besar. Tapi mati-mati dia kata muat. OK lah, muat tu muat la..I didnt want to be fussy.

So tok kadi tu sampai. And my PA system sampai just in time when the kadi sampai, alhamdulillah. And nasib la baik, kalau tak.. sure mati wedding planner itu. heheh.. Dia pun memulakan sedikit tazkirah yang sangat straight forward. Takde lawak, takder tokok tambah. Suara pun tak kuat mana. Saya di belakang sana, tak dengar apa-apa. And the tok kadi didnt even interact with me. Mana tau if salah bride macam mana? Hishh..

Tapi ok lah, the ceramah wasn't long. Straight to point, benda yang wajib-wajib je dia cakap. Dia pun lapar agaknya, and lidah pun penat baru lepas bagi ceramah kat masjid tadi (kan khamis malam jumaat).

Tekun betul dia mendengar. Dengar tu takpe, tapi jangan lupa pesan tok kadi tu ok? ;)



Pic credits to Samsultahir, the official photographer and Jannah

Melayu, why you so like that?

I have been wanting to write about this issue but I never had the time to write. And it is something that is making me so sad when hearing these kind of issues. What's more hurtful is those involved are generally malays, my own race.

Buang anak dalam tong sampah (my opinion on this, read here)
Seks di luar tabi'i
Seks sumbang muhrim
Dera anak
Bunuh mak, bapak, atok, nenek dan sedara mara
Rogol adik-beradik, anak-beranak
Dadah sana sini
And the latest one, liwat own son yang berumur 23 HARI. Read here.

Tak payah la sebut tentang agama. Ini bukan soal tak cukup ajaran agama. Binatang yang takder agama pun sayang anak beranak. Bukan soal agama tapi soal bangsa. Bangsa melayu adalah bangsa yang paling lemah. Sad but true.

Kita banyak hidup mengaharapkan privilege bumiputra. Tanpa allocation for bumiputera mampu kah kita ke hadapan bertentangan dengan orang bukan bangsa kita? Di luar sana our leaders sibuk mempertahankan hak hak orang melayu, Tapi, kita berhak ke dapat kan hak hak tu? We rely on our leaders to fight for our rights, Do we really fight for it? Work our ass for it? No. We expect other people to work hard FOR you.

Sebab itu kita mundur. Sebab itu kita tak pernah maju. OK, off topic a bit.

Dalam dunia dadah, orang lain jadi kaya sebab jadi pusher (business), orang kita yang ambik dan membinasakan diri.
Dalam dunia pelacuran, orang lain jadi kaya sebab provide pompuan pompuan (business), orang kita yang dtg dan hire pompuan pompuan tu
Dalam dunia perniagaan in BIG corporations, konon dominated by malays because it is a malay business example like takaful insurance. Memang orang melayu yang banyak, tapi yang level bawah-bawah. But checkout the managerial levels? Semua bukan orang kita. I have seen enough.

Takaful insurance is something yang kita can take advantage of because we are muslims and we are more familiar with our own syariah rules. In my previous company that I worked with, the takaful experts are two non-muslims, semua bukan orang kita.

We never take the opportunities that we have. Sebab kita hanya duduk untuk tunggu hak kita sebagai orang melayu. Sambil tu kita buat aktiviti-aktiviti/ perkara-perkara yang terkutuk. Of coz la not ALL malays, but generally la. Melayu sangat synonim dengan perkataan-perkataan ni:

Malas
Dadah
Buang anak
Rogol
Dengki
Gossip

Kenapa melayu? Why you so like that?

(Eh Gossip tu saya pun suka. Saya kan Melayu? :p)

pic from: letmefindout.webs.com

Summary Belanjawan 2012

This the summary of the recent budget, which I summarise for my husband that chose to watch sports than the Budget announcement. The following table is the summary of budget allocation in big sectors.

Tema: Dasar Transformasi Nasional: Bajet membela rakyat, mensejahtera Negara

Focus on five points

First Point: Meligat Pelaburan

1. Rolling Plan Kedua for Rnacangan Malaysia ke-10 focusing on high impact development projects. Any projects worth over RM50 mill will be ensured to benefit the people from every sen spent (Highways and railways)

2. Dana Mudahcara perkongsian awam-swasta to help private sector in developing strategic projects for the country (10% allocation to Bumiputera businesses)

3. Active development on five federal corridors (Iskandar Johor, Koridor Utara, Koridor Pantai Timur, Koridor Sabah, Koridor Sarawak) mainly on highways and industrial projects


4. Forming Central Treasury Management and to attract multinationals to choose Malaysia for this service, there will be income tax and duty stamp waiver

5. Pusat Kewangan Antarabangsa Kuala Lumpur (KLIFD) with tax incentives, allowances and duty sramp waiver for companies with KLFD status

6. Put Felda Global Ventures Holdings listed in KLSE to attract foreign investors, maintaining majority equity holding by Koperasi Permodalan Felda

7. Prolong the tax concession at 10% on  dividends for non corporate and individuals in Amanah Pelaburan Hartanah

8. Fund support for Perusahaan Kecil Sederhana (PKS) from Islamic bankers

9. SME Revitalisation Fund to grants loans max RM 1mill to entrepreneurs for business recovery purposes handled by SME Bank.

10. Emergency Fund for PKS that encounters natural disasters through SME Bank and MIDF

11. Franchise fees will be allowable for tax deduction on franchisee. Full waiver on import duty and excise duty for franchisors to import more hybrid and electric cars.

12. Pelan Induk Lima Tahun Pembangunan Pelancongan Langkawi

13. Invetors in four and five stars hotel will have tax incentives for 5 years

14. Properties disposed within 2 years of owning, will be subject to RPGT at 10% (5% if held the asset more than 2 years.

Second point: Menungguli modal insane, mencerna kreativiti dan mencetus inovasi

1. Gerakan Inovasi Nasional in schools and IPTAs. Introducing Anugerah Cipta 1Malaysia to recognise students and youngsters innovations. Reality programmes, articles and documentaries on students' innovations

2. Dana Inovasi Pengkomersilan to fund PKS companies

3. Invention and design industry will be qualified for Taraf Perintis with tax incentives up to 70% for 5 years

4. Allocation in development and refurbishments of schools

5. Ensure access high quality education that is affordable by abolishing school fees for primary and secondary schools. There will also be tax incentives to private schools that plan for reduction in school fees

6. Donations by individuals to schools, mosques, temples and churches will be tax deductible  

7. Tax allowable with double deductions  to companies with expenses on internship programmes, scholarships and career exhibition in overseas

Third point: Program Transformasi Luar Bandar

1. To form Pusat Transformasi Luar Bandar (RPT) as centre to integrate services, banking and insurance, business consultancy, training, clinics and business centres. For starters, focus will be on Terminal Agrobines Negara, Wakaf Che Yeh and Gopeng.

2. Profesional Services Funds for professionals such as lawyers, doctors and accountants to open up firm in small towns through BSN granting loans with 4% interest

3.  Program Lonjakan Mega Luar Bandar in 11 Agropolitant Project areas for agriculture

4. Strengthen the development of infrastructure for Program Jalan Luar Bandar dan Projek Perhubungan Desa especially in Sabah and Sarawak

5. Banking services, transportation, utilities improvements.

Fourth point: Memperkejap Perkhidmatan Awam

1. Exit policy for civil servants with low performance and those who leaves the service

2. Increase the salary structure for civil servants

3. Better career path and promotions for teachers based on time-based method, not based on vacancies

4. Better increment up to 7 to 13 %. Increase pension rate to 2% a year

5. Retirement age change from 55 to 60 years old

6. Offer help on education fees for civil servants to further studies part time

7. Allocation to development and social needs of PDRM and army forces.

8. One off contribution amounting to RM3,000 given to people who had served the country in defense unit

Fifth point: Meredakan inflasi dan mengimarah kehidupan rakyat

1. Allocation to develop agriculture sector through Projek Pertanian Bersepadu Terengganu Utara, Projek Pengairan Sabah dan Sarawak, Tabung Ekonomi Kumpulan Usaha Niaga

2. Allocation for welfare including poor old folks RM300 per month, poor children RM100 per month and OKU up to Rm 300 per month.

3. To add more Kedai Rakyat 1Malaysia that offers products with 40% price lower than market.

4. Opening Agro Bazaar Kedai Rakyat that offers agriculture products

5. Encourage cafeterias to include Menu Rakyat 1Malaysia

6. Skim Rumah Pertamaku for income earner less than RM3,000, house price max of RM400,000 developed by PR1MA in Sungai Besi and Sungai Buloh area

7. Program Perumahan Rakyat affordable houses under RM10k

8. Program Rumah Mesra Rakyat, each house will have subsidy of RM20,000

9. Program Pemulihan Rumah Terbengkalai

10. Expats are now allowed to take out EPF for housing loan

11. Tabung Khas Perumahan nelayan

12. Develop and refurbish hospitals, add 81 more clinics and 50 klinik 1 Malaysia

13. Improve and refurbish HKL

14. Flexi timetable medical officers in average 60 hours a week. Allowance on waktu bekerja fleksi amounting to RM600 per month. On-call allowance up to RM80 per night

15. Skim Amanah Rakyat 1Malaysia for combine income of lower than RM3,000 wher einvestors in this scheme may apply for loan up to RM5,000 with 5 years repayment term period through PNB

16. Peneraju Agenda Bumiputera to help Bumiputera in business. Guidance will be given to Bumi corporates to be listed in KLSE

17. Tax incentives given to taxi owners including road tax and subsidies

18. Additional RM 10 mill to Yayasan Bantuan Guaman Kebangsaan

19. Additional allocation to Kebajikan Masyarakat

20. Training programmes for women professionals to return to working world

21. Amanah Ikhtiar Malaysia will help to fund micro loans to entrepreneurs especially women

22. To build a hospital especially for women and children in KL

23. Allocation to Majlis Belia Malaysia to offer trainings, courses and leadership activities

24. To form MyCreative Venture Capital

25. Improvements on football fields and futsal courts

26. Allocation to find new talents for high profile sports like football, badminton, cycling

27. Citizen above 60 years old will not have to pay for registration fees as outpatient in hospitals and clinics including dental clinics owned by government

28. 50% discount given to citizens above 60 years old for LRT and monorel

29. New tax waiver for annual EPF and insurance amounting to RM3,000

30. Employer’s contronution on EPF increase from 12% to 13% for employee earning lower than RM5,000 per month

31. One off cash of RM500 to household with combined income of less than RM3,000

32. One-off contribution to school students amounting to RM100

33. One off book voucher to IPTA and IPTS students amounting to RM200

34. KWSP contributors can register for Haj through ring-fencing method from Account 2 amounting to RM1,300 without taking out the money from the account

35. Additional half month bonus to civil servants and RM500 contributions to pensioners

I guess nothing of the above benefits me,

UNLESS, i want start a business

UNLESS, i want to venture into agriculture

UNLESS, i have children going to schools

And those one-off one-off contribution, does it REALLY HELP? i don't know. 

Whatever. That makes us, the middle class people at the same position as before. 

The lady at home

First week as a lady boss at home, oh well, you can call it lady boss or lady of leisure but those are just other words of calling a housewife.

Some may ask, why lady boss? Because I decide what to buy for the kitchen, I decide what to serve for dinner, I decide what to do during weekends, and I decide IF WANT TO COOK OR NOT :)

Pic taken from: zazzle.com

So why lady of leisure? Because I don't have to work? NOT. My husband always say that the house works like a company. It needs managers and workers. And shall I add a banker? However, in this small corporate body where we only have two people in the house, we have to brush up on our inter-personal skills on MULTITASKING. And the banker in the house is really a related party (my husband himself). So he is the sales manager who brings money in to the house and also a banker who disburses money whenever we need.

I am the auditor because I am so used of being one, only this time I am less lenient on myself. hmm..hmm.. I don't impose on audit trails where we need to have evidence of receipts in the house.

I am also the accountant, where I control certain budgets and cash outflow. Especially on cigarettes. My husband would ask me should he buy this and that. But I am not a queen control, because I don't ask for this budget controller position, I was NOMINATED by my husband *muka tak bersalah*

I am also the entertainment manager, well mostly for self entertainment during the times when my husband is at work. I watch all sorts of channel changing from Malay to English to Korean to Chinese to Hindustan, and sometimes to Cartoon channels. Because when my husband is around, I give him some autonomy to operate the sports channel.

Apart from all those chill tasks, I am also the maintenance department manager. I am the cleaner, my husband is the engineer. But there's not much technical jobs to be done in the house, however, there a lottts of cleaning to be done daily and weekly. So since I am the manager and I do not have enough resources, my husband sometimes get to be seconded to the cleaning unit. Sometimes he wash the dishes and sometimes he does the laundry. But really, it's just SOMETIMES, because most of the times, I do things myself.

Well, what else to say, I am also the Food & Beverage department manager. And because I don't employ any workers, I have to cook myself. And SOMETIMES when he is not working, he helps to cook. Ohohoooo.. when he is in the kitchen, he becomes Chef Ramsey and my kitchen feels like in the Hell's Kitchen show.

Because you see, he cooks better than I do, not because I can't cook (chewah, nak jugak), but because I never really cook for the past 5 years. I lost touch (chewah, nak lagi).

So you see, I still have to work you know? And I am still answerable to certain things to the Board of director, which is the ultimate boss, my husband, because I am not only working for myself. I am working for us. So time management is also important. I wake up the same time he wakes up for work. I drive him (Oh, yes, did I not mention this? I am also the driver!!) to the station for him to take the bus to Singapore. During the day, I have to study (sambil tengok TV of course) and I have to manage my time to cook so that dinner will be ready just in time when he comes home. After dinner I have to do a lot of washing and cleaning.

So it's really not that leisure. Unless, I get a maid. *eyelashes* Hmmm for the meantime, maybe I should impose giving salary to myself yang setimpal dengan gaji manager-manager di luar sana. heheh..

InsyaAllah, I am hoping and praying that I would come to that stage where I can call myself the Lady of Leisure, hopefully when I finish exams (Lady of Leisure, Association of Chartered Accountant) and have kids of my own, and hire a maid and husband getting his first million (insyaAllah). So I don't have to do the house chores while maintaining the 'manager' position for all departments. So I can focus my time on my kids (insyaAllah) and my husband. Ini impian seorang surirumah.

P/S: Semalam mak mentua saya pesan pada suami saya "jangan suruh dia masak hari-hari, nanti dia penat. makan la luar" Yahooo!! I love you, mak!

Ijab Qabul review - Waiting for the groom

19 May 2011 (Part 1)

The day started very very early as I could recall. I couldn't sleep well because I wasn't even sleeping on a bed as the katil pengantin was all made up already. And mom said, I have to wait for my husband to sleep on the katil pengantin. So I slept on a daybed in my parent's room. Not that it was uncomfy, but the thought of not sleeping properly on a bed annoys me (just an alasan, maybe I was damn nervous about the wedding that was gonna take place in less than 24 hours time).

My advice to the b2b, PLEASE SLEEP WELL!!!!! Make sure you prepare a tilam that is very comfortable for you to sleep off the nervousness.

I was tired when I woke up (believe me), but when I came down the hall, I saw people already started to work on the pelamin and stuffs. I forgot about the nervousness and started to be excited again.

The theme for the akad nikah was 'Moroccan wedding - Black and Fuschia Pink'

Outside the foyer was all carpeted and all the chairs and tables from the house was brought out to be utilised by people during dinner

From different angle

Just some decoration for the pond

We adopted the concept of buffet style with stalls

MUA, Kak Saidatulnissa arrived my house with her assistant Kak Liza at 4pm. Both of them are very very nice people, so what you heard about Kak Sai being diva and all sorts are definitely wrong. Kak Sai never talks to you on the phone, Kak Liza always sounds garang, but believe me, they are very friendly in person. But some tips that some people tell me about Kak Sai, jangan buat dia hilang mood, nanti hilang seri pengantin.

Theme colour for the room - white, green and brown (kaler kayu)

Oh, another thing, don't always assume that the MUA will bring her assistant like I did. I thought Kak liza will tag along to assist her and I thought I could just ask her assistant to make up the MOTB, mother of the bride. Unfortunately, Kak Sai was supposed to come alone, because I didn't ask for any assistance. Nasib baik I called and reconfirmed. Kak Liza actually rescheduled her appointment to help me out for my mom.  She was very nice.. and I was very thankful to her. Otherwise, MOTB will have to make up herself.

Saidatulnissa

Malam menjelma, hati mula berdebar kembali. Berdebar sebab apa pon tak tau sebenarnya. Nak kata tak pernah jumpa bakal suami, dah bercinta 6 tahun, nak kata takut persiapan tak betul, dah ada wedding planner. Serious tak tahu kenapa.

Night view of the khemah. 

We put a TV outside, so the people not getting place inside can also watch the akad nikah. We adopted a concept where the guests can start to eat first even before the arrival of the groom. Reason being, it was a Thursday night, so the akad would naturally start very late because the Tok Imam needs to give ceramah first and only come to my house after isya'. So we didnt want people to wait. However, the tables for the groom's family are berhidang and reserved.

Yang slack nya from this is, there was no volume coming out from the TV. So next time (not for me lah :p), must remember to get some audio assistance for the extra TVs or screens. Well it was last minute pun.

The centrepiece for each table

Tables for the groom's family and my VIP (atok-atok and opah-opah saya)

Since it was not a seated dinner, people can laze around makan-makan bersila like arab style at this  side of the house. Brilliant idea! I love it.

I have no comments on the deco, I loved every single area of the house. Like it was transformed. But... Guess what's missing? Meja makan pengantin!!!!!!! OK, I overlooked this and the Wedding planner oso overlooked this!! haiyaaa, no wonder la i hungry sampai esok pagi. So moral of the story, although you have a very reliable wedding planner (believe me mine was very reliable so they said, and he had done a lot of famous weddings), you must always have your own checklist. They too are human.

Well, ok. 

The hantarans are all ready now. Tunggu untuk dibalas jer.

Jam tangan

Cake sponsored by bff Zetty, thank you syg

Casual wear set, baju, pants and belt

Set baju melayu

Camera 

Wedding ring

Macaroons 

Sejadah and al-Quran

Sirih junjung

All the hantarans are ready

Almost done

Always the first to arrive, love you babe!

So thankful to my girlfriends, walaupun hari kerja, they were there before the groom arrive. Tapi yang tak bestnya, by the time they arrived, the cameramen already left my room, to capture the photos of the guests and also getting ready for the groom. If I can turn back time (and if I had extra bajet, ahaha) I would hire a photographer to stand just near me and my girlfriends. Well, I had the intention, but the cost wiiiiuuueee, out of my bajet laa.. so harap gambar kengkawan je la to remind me that these girls actually came to my akad nikah. 

Zetty, Ashik, Syikin, ShoN, Aliaa, Dini and Nana - Pemberi semangat

All ready

Take a peek

Dalam hati, "mana pengantin ni, perut dah lapar nih". Pengantin, please makan dulu sikit before make up. Sekian.

photo courtesy: Samsultahir, the official photographer, and Nana and Jannah